can you have both asperger's and narcissism

He responded that since I just couldnt wait until he was better to hear from him, and since we had no interests in common, that some time apart would give us perspective. I keep reading that we dont recover but I i imagine there has to be something that works, both for me and people that encounter me. No. Eat clean, detox, stand in a forest in the sun. Ive read Frederics contribution and the confusion and anger he expresses is difficult to read. Can anyone suggest what I can do ???? It was after almost 2 weeks without a single grain of rice. With my 3 bro/sis all narc to heavy level its sure i was meant to be or .. am i? How is that to their advantage? She likens it to living in a bubble and when she steps out of that bubble and she cant handle it, anxiety takes over. This works out well because Narcissistic people dont take responibilty or blame for any of their own behaviour and having a condition to blame works for both of us. Like today . Here are some tips: If you are with a person with a personality condition such as narcissism, then you may have similar unfulfilled relationship issues, as well as the added bonus of emotional abuse. There is a site called First Wives World that may be of help as well. I was born into what seems to me to be a family of narcs and was terribly bullied, abused and scapegoated both as a child and as an adult in the end I had to cut contact with my whole family. Am I moaning too much? having anxiety about going to school. The difference between these women is really easy to spot. He said I it was from a 30 year job in law enforcement where that is accepted but I think its just the way he is like he has no clue not to do it. I just wish I could manage better. I try to be as humble and honest as i can but in our world the narcs are everywhere and they abuse it everytime they can so i had to change. They do not ignore each other for a power trip the absolute norm in modern society, in person or online communications. My child has been diagnosed as being Autistic. I suffered so much, went down in alcoolism, drugs, compulsive gambling. Always been told i am LAZY LAZY how.. i am ADHD too! metal poisoning, food intolerance etc For one thing, both are on a spectrum. This article is painfully outdated and misinformed about autism which makes me question the other things it says too (though not everything is wrong). Maybe thats just evidence that some things can be more than one thing, and that someone can be a bit Aspergers AND a bit narcissistic. What gets me most is he takes no interest in the house, I own the house and he moved in with me from living with his parents. Narcissistic traits can emerge in adolescence but NPD is a personality disorder that isn't typically diagnosed before age 18. As I look at the descriptions of each in this article, what behaviours of each look like in everyday life, it is not as clear cut as it is often made out to be. I do not understand manipulative behaviour and fall into the same traps over and over again, even with the same person. Think about all the mean things hes done to you, not the good things, and you may find there wasnt that many good things anyway, if you put the good and bad side by side. We then began watching a couple of DVDs, one depicting Temple Grandins life growing up and her struggle with her autism. I was convinced my husband is a narc and left him because of it. Thanks for listening. Id like to hear from some of these unusual couples as they may be an inspiration for less fortunate individuals. I couldnt behave properly for a woman and even less children. Think I am almost there. Only when I moved out from the shared house did I lose my fear of her. No DIY, repairs, painting or buy things for the house, I feel like he doesnt deserve it! he a generous man, kind in a funny way, like washing dishes, hoovering, etc without asking. Forgive my writing, im pretty rubbish at Grammar etc. Furthermore, many on the autistic spectrum are hyper-empathic and hyper-feeling, and if you speak with autistic people, you would know that. But anyway the novel is getting long again so ill leave it there for the story. People living on devices, with bluelight burning their retina and corneas. The Aspergers description is clumsily written and inaccurate. It is helpful to be flexible and adaptable. It would be good if this article was at the very least amended because it still comes up in search terms and it is perpetuating harmful beliefs. Hes clueless about the damage he causes. 1. While I absolutely LOVE being right and will happily crow about it when I am, I am actually more interested in finding THE TRUTH than in being right and I can readily admit to being wrong or making a mistake. But well, still with such a family and childhood. How to Tell the Difference. It certainly has taints of narcissism. It was one of the saddest days of my life yet it was also one of the most powerful as I had spend a lifetime being controlled by this man I tried so hard to love. My brother stopped communicating with me. When I read the report in the link, it certainly described her situation. Break up and never look back. Even if i am myself very smart allowing to study on my own and discover things others couldnt etc. I wrote that.. i was dying.. humans cant stay alive forever without eating just because See.. thats .. narcs stupidity their lack of empathy.. care.. made them totally unable to understand i lived in a foundation for autistic peep that suffered.. with therapist sand psys and NO ONE saw the problem with me asking for help and ways to get food and have Everyone ignore me The director had even humiliated me in front of everyon else to establish her domination on me she jumped af when she got my message that was sent to everyone. Even if i explain and show how my mother tried 3 times in 15 years to push me to suicide by enabling gambling and making me have loans i didnt even want. I also realise I have been happy to get into narcissistic relationships in the past without knowing what I was getting into. I been destroyed and they tried to ruin my life up to .. erasing it for decades. What you are saying definitely makes sense. Psys and therapists say its impossible that i be narc, impossible. He is a truly great person to me just not to others. As I said previously I have a daughter (unmarried) who has high functioning autism, I have another daughter who doesnt have autism, but has two children with it. My question is, is it possible for someone who is narcisstic to have a result from one of these quizzes that comes back saying he is likely autistic when he is not? Im in a 30 year relationship with an empathic woman who is just wonderful. Because my family were nasty game players, I became more desperate to fit in and then easier to use and manipulate. (seared conscience). If you build house you build houses! This is not something any of my family have had to encounter before and I really struggle with it. Delilah Has anyone run across any studies of people who have had no vaccines or other exposure to heavy metals etc, who dont use drugs including caffeine, and/or who take supplements including essential minerals, B and other stress vitamins? I see him starting to ask me questions about myself because I think (hope) hes beginning to care about me more. Thanks so much for helping me. My daughter is 33 and she was only diagnosed last year. I watch everyone outside .. its a free-for-all in the world. I probably triggered her to self-medicate. She lives with me. Narcissism IS high functioning autism where intervention has failed and been fooled by a child desperate to survive and appear normal as they approach teens and social survival starts to become paramount. He certainly seems to be a box of tricks. One minute you are feeling ok about your relationship and the next asking yourself was it you that caused the situation where you needed time apart. So all of his behavior never made sense to me. Break up and never look back. Because my daughter is a slow reader and finds it hard to take in all the information at once, I have been reading these books to her one chapter at a time in the evening. Im a laid back person & im used to him not talking to me & wanting his own space to do his own thing & not socialising , but sometimes he gets me so stressed I end up with a bad headache & feel sick. I realized he does have some aspects of Aspergers but more of narcissism. So in recent years Im stronger than ever and able to stand my ground. But there is a big difference from one who knows he/she needs help and one who thinks he/she has all the answers and is always right, because they want to cover up their demons. I think these are both related to the abuse that Im sure (but without any evidence) that they received. However the lack of empathy leads to narcissistic behaviours and a misunderstanding of the real cause of symptoms. Because there are many individuals that are not the same? The car, the TV, feminism, the internet, and now, unashamedly the smart phone you can go back and say the mirror of course. Narcissists tend to feel that others' achievements are solely due to luck and conceive of themselves as the sole victims of circumstance. I hope Ive now got an extra ten years up my sleeve. I suggest walking away from those you dont, and dont give in to the guilt trip that you feel bad because you havent seen them, or some other guilt you feel. Now that I understand what makes her tick, I have been able to make adjustments to the way we interact and this has made our lives far better. I didnt want to hurt them or have children that would end up like me. I learned that my breakdown was caused not by the stress of change of job and moving house to another county. I have set myself boundarys as far as her stepping into my personal life, and I am the one who has to step her back if she over reaches, because she just feels she is trying to sort it. The reason Im relating this is because whether a person is Autistic or otherwise they are people!!!! His main source was Jacques Ellul and his manifest was totally coherent. I will say that one of the saddest things I have been thinking about her, and about anyone with mental health conditions like the above mentioned is how much danger they could be putting themselves in if left untreated. You dont need a religion to know that demonic possession is real, just because materialism denies it. This happened at a hospital school in the late 1950s where he was sent away to for six months. Or do I need to paste in quotes from former chief editors of this, trashing it absolutely as pseudoscience? I want to be able to do more observing and not inhaling and absorbing that behavior, but you can probably tell that this is of course what I do. She may be 34 but she is more like 22 in her mind, although she is very bright and creative. That i should not worry its impossible not to worry since i know and see everyday all the narcs totally unable to see the problem.. see the face in the mirror Totally blinded. I had to get my teaching license renewed and finally retired as a teacher. She literally panic on me day after day sayng its mafia money i need to lose asap its dangerous! I didnt resent the fact that he wanted to stay a single man as he brought a lot to my life in other ways. The bipolar seems to be more like borderline disorder than bipolar even though my family as strong bipolar genes. These experiences and many many more in life, has contributed to a metaphor, this has helped me clarify what happens in life, Imagine: group of 10 people in a room with a small bust in the centre of the people sitting around it, one person is totally blind (but he has no idea he is) The other seeing people dont know hes blind but just has some peculiar mannerisms, everyone is talking about the lovely blue marble bust of a Queen. Hes just not interested. I dont have a partner, I dont need one, my brain is now at peace not screwed up by someone else trying to manipulate it. It may be that people with Aspergers are as varied in their characters as other folk, some of whom are incredibly cruel to animals and some of whom love then to bits. I have lost count of how many emails I have sent, doors knocked, letters posted, complaints to councils made, about the noise neighbours we have had make. She even pushed me to lose 100,000$ i had won gmabling while i was just tyring to quit knowing it was all going back. There is definitely overlap between the two based on this article and we need to look at people who may be both narcisistic and on the spectrum. This could be interpreted as intimidation and abuse of your easy going nature. Its like a surgeon in a surgery room see a person bleeding to death and hes like well hope you will clean up the mess when you get better cauz i wont and leave I mean.. its insane They have 0 logic.. 0 brain. When I read those two lists of traits, one for autism and one for narcissism, some time ago, I felt they were a basic set. Im allergic to dogs but it only mattered to him what she wanted. Yes, my emotions were running high and my feelings were very hurt; but I am a gentle, thoughtful person with many family and friends suffering from mental illness. All I can say from my own experience is to try to learn as much as you can about the condition to help with understanding it. I have also been a little different, not to his degree but do know how difficult growing up and living like that can be. For the narcissist it is always about themselves and in a very selfish manner. Does he do horrible things, yes. but regularly interrups whatever I am doing to demand attention NOW. He told me I have Aspergers Syndrome, I had books to buy and strategies to learn etc. Yes I agree. For example, many people with high-functioning autism are capable of manipulation, guilt-tripping, and not allowing you to say no. So now, one might wonder, what is really meant by normal? He is obsessed with his teeth. So hes selfish but I know where I am with him because he cant play emotional games like normal people can. I told him this once and he said maybe you shouldnt be with me then. Why would there not be any DSM explanation for people having autism doing something shitty or is the 1-sided autism made him/her do it? I am 72 (still feel young) :-). Is it Asperger's or Narcissism or Both? Im so unsure of myself now, perhaps I am too sensitive and feel like Im the one who has screwed this up by asking him to change behavior he cant help. saying it was all my fault bla bla. . We have also reccently found out that not only is it likely to be on my partners side of the family but also on my mothers side of the family (yet to be officially diagnosed but very likely). I do care about him because I think he has a problem and maybe cant help himself but its getting tiresome. Your partner will probably not be able to do the things that are important to youat least not in a satisfying manner. I have always wondered if im narcissistic not even considering im autistic. The problem is I know my father is an narcissist, I have thought that for many years. I found it very difficult to find someone that would diagnose adult autism. I had no idea how narcissism presented itself in relationships and have read a lot about it as time has passed. My husband is fine with animals but has problems with humans. Develop healthy, happy connections within other relationships. He can be as sweet as pie and can be mean and cruel I suspected autisim (his nephew has a more than moderate case living with supervision in a home). a lack of imaginary play. After over 30 years I have been worn down and become apathetic, permanently tired, lacking in motiviation and unable to find much joy in my life. Its just that they are not equipped to figure all i could, and the society itself is built to protect narcs and not the opposite. Educate yourself on both afflictions, I found my final answer on a site called First Wives World if I may add this here, it was like a weight lifted from my shoulders after reading the piece of information where someone else had suffered under a narcissist. THEN we could assess peoples true basic functioning, and start our therapeutic approach from there. I never actually BELIEVED the hurt words he would say but it would still hurt. They do not do this to be controlling, feed their ego, or fulfill a personal need for superiority. You be the one in charge, not him. What I have learned is he is who he is and he will never change. Inappropriate sexual behaviour was being exhibited too. We have both worked hard to make our marriage work but I felt so hurt today when he seemed anxious because my sister came to visit me, I have just had a major operation and she came over to give me some company and was gone before he got home. The ones that work to gain your trust.. work in fields like these.. are nice .. too nice.. then stab you in the back or when you ask.. the important questions like mine.. they suddenly start working in the same direction aas my family. He said it was the way they unwind their minds that are on overload. I was never expecting her to call bank and release the other 5k in 15 minutes??? Im too strong of a person to let the pain and frustration linger for too long; but at the moment my curiosities are running on high, high octane searching for answers given the information and memories I have of our brief relationship. Retrieved from https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/04/050411204511.htm. please allow this thought (it is a fact to the normal smart person but it could get you censored online to mention it) Its the only way, hes toxic and it wont ever get any better. Interventions usually focus on helping people manage behaviors and develop skills that help them function more effectively in different environments. I now understand my daughter a whole lot better and why she thinks like she does. From what you have said I can see a certain amount of manipulation going on. He has not worked for 10 years now (hes 46) and I am the only person bringing in money. I dont think aspergers is the opposite of narcissism, they're just different disorders and someone could have both. Holey moley, sometimes you have to go deep down in the comments to find the real deal :) Thanks!

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